aruan | A not-so-hypothetical question:

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A not-so-hypothetical question:

Say a friend asked you to write a relatively easy paper for him, with plenty of advance, on a book you're already more than halfway through anyway, for a class of over 200 people for which the chances of the professor being the one to read all the four-page papers himself being, just an a generous ballpark figure, slim to none.

The only caveat being that you wrote said professor a brief paper last semester (for a different class of about as many people).

Oh, and you stand to make a pretty sweet profit.

Thoughts?

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I'd totally do it. In high school, my friend took dual enrollment English. She hated writing. I wrote nearly two semesters worth of Beer Can College freshman comp essays by the time I graduated high school, and was well, well paid through wonderful acts of kindness every time we hung out. :)

Maybe if I never had to have anything to do with the professor and was graduating this semester and had a bit less distinctive of a writing style, then it'd be something I'd take seriously, but as it stands, not so much.

Not for any amount of money in the world. Cheating at University is fucked. Really fucked.

See, and the thing is, my guilt complex is just way too overdeveloped, so it's not really like I posted that as a for-real scenario after walking away from it for a couple of hours. If nothing else, I want to be able to look this professor in the eyes again should the need arise later in my academic career, but mostly, I'd be way too paranoid to do it in the first place.

Plus, you know, with the wrong and academic honesty and my whole life spent with teachers commending my "distinct" writing style.

So, for a thousand reasons and not one besides the incentives offered against them, I'm declining the offer.

Yeah, that's the right choice. And ethics aside, there are way too many consequences to getting caught cheating in college and they would pursue you and your friend for the rest of your lives.

Nope. Never would do it, and I've been asked in the past. The consequences are too big if you get caught, and you can never guarantee that you would. Also, it's just wrong to pay someone to write your paper for you, ya know? If it's an easy book, an easy paper, and only four freaking pages? He should do it himself. Hell, if it's a hard paper on a hard book and 400 pages, he should do it himself.

Really, I can't think of a situation where doing someone's homework for him/her is acceptable.

::tosses down $0.02::

See, and the only reason I even gave the offer the time of day was the very limited chances of being caught, the fact that I'm already reading and have things to say about the book, that he's a writer going to an out-of-town conference this weekend who already has a ten-page paper to write by Thursday. The opportunistic altruist within me exerts an influence, but not strong enough to overpower my guilt complex. And you're absolutely right, as small as the chances are of being caught, they're still too much bigger than my not doing it at all.

Thanks for your perspective.

I wouldn't be too happy about the 'do it for me' thing either, but with the rest of the circumstances, if this is otherwise a friend or generally okay person-just-overwhelmed-by-too-much-stuff, is there a way to help him out in an above board way? Review his attempt, or give him a bullet-pointed list of things he might want to keep in mind when writing? The sort of thing you don't get thrown out for, but which might fairly be remunerated with free pizza or something...

He wouldn't have any chance to get started, as he needs to have read the book to do so and has, as mentioned, other large obligations already looming this week. It's not like he asked me for the answers to a test I could've helped him study for, you know? Otherwise, totally would've offered to do that. Cheating and copying is not my style, and I won't say I've never ever done either, but a couple of answers on a ninth-grade history test or the last five problems of my algebra homework isn't a paper that can stand to ruin my aspirations as a journalist.

Gotcha.

Yeah, the consequences are ridiculous, especially for something this trivial. It was just tempting for a minute as the chances of repercussion seemed so small. But there's a reason why integrity is practically on any journalistic job application.

It's totally unlikely I'd ever do that. But everyone has to make their own decision.

But seriously I dislike people who have others do their work for them. It makes me wonder in what else they cut corners and cheat.

I'm not, for all the reasons already mentioned. I don't have a good track record with getting away with things, so that alone should've been a dealbreaker from the start.

I, as a general rule, don't like such characters either, but he's really in a bad place (no matter how responsible he is for being there in the first place) and I know how hard it can get to keep up with school and be a full-time editor, much less department head/chief writer of an entire section.

Never. Never. Never.

No amount of money is worth that risk.

Basically, it would've been no skin off my back and helping out a friend is why I ever even considered it. But yeah, in the end, however small the risk, it's not worth the potential consequences. Especially not for someone with a journalistic career in mind.

Absolutely never. The stakes are too high and academic mishonesty at any large University is certainly grounds for expulsion.

Small as the chances are, that's the conclusion I came to as well. And you're absolutely right about university policy, plus the added fact that I want to be a journalist, one of the most crucial fields for a spotless record in that regard.

Academic integrity keeps me warm at night. I say back away slowly and smile reassuringly.

That's the plan. I realize I wasn't actually asking the question after walking away from the proposition for a couple of hours, but you're absolutely right. Academic or otherwise, integrity gives me warm fuzzies, too.

*blinks* If it's a real friend, then I'd suggest he should, rather than use a friend (because no matter if it's paid or not, it's just awkward and icky and not kosher, ethically, academically or socially) and put her in academic jeopardy, instead spring for dinner and spend a night going over the material with her while getting writing tips and putting together an outline. He'd benefit more (and learn a bit about work ethic), but would still get some help. And, well, free food is cool.

Well, the idea is that he's already got a huge paper to write this week, a weekend-long conference to attend and cover, and can't get away with not reading the book for the paper, which is due Monday. That's in addition to working at the paper all the rest of this week plus the working weekend. But after I actually sat down and thought about it, I know I'm not really asking this question for a thousand reasons.

Couple of things. And I write this knowing that you know that I know you wouldn't do it, because I've seen firsthand how much you suck at looking people in the eye in questionable situations. :-)

(1) Monday's a long ways away. Weekend aside, that's still days and days left. And if he has time enough to grab dinner or use a computer, he has time enough to sit down and read an outline of the book or get it told to him by a friend who's read it. Four pages isn't nearly long enough to get deeply analytical, so chances are he could BS his way easily enough into a general topic that he could write more comfortably in, then somehow tie it back into the book with a friend's help. That's guidance, but not cheating.

(2) Being one of several people I know who work and go to school full time taking upper division seminars (where research and analyzation and papers over the 15-page minimum are the norm) while still managing to find time to attend all sorts of functions, I understand time is always short. However, I'm sure that he, you, and everybody else in this world are not unfamiliar with last-minute papers written the night before or day of deadline. You just have to take it like a... erm, man. Sometimes that can suck real hard, but a C can balance out over a semester and it'll still be his own work. And really? Four pages is what, one and a half hours of writing? Ten pages is not what I'd call huge. It's a night's writing and research, maybe.

(3) I just can't believe that any book for a liberal arts class is completely un-paperable without reading, if you have a good summary. Because stories and ideas are never new, and there's bound to be something that he's read that's similar and he's bound to have had some thoughts about some themes in the past.

Just thinking outloud now. But really, I mostly worry that he could see you as somebody that would possibly accept such a proposition, because that doesn't sound like something a friend would ask a friend. *shrug*

Well, writing papers takes a bit longer than all that on my end, but I see all your points, and like I said, I've rejected the proposition after, you know, more than two seconds of thought.

The offer was extended to everyone in the office. I'm on good terms with him because we're usually the two there the latest, me because of whatever, he because he heads the online department.

My father rendered me completely incapable of lying early on in life. I don't even know why I bother.

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A not-so-hypothetical question:

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