oh, Pirates, how so bad?

They had Capt. Jack Sparrow, pirate lore, a trip to the underworld with an undead pirate guide, a wacky psychic, a smart ambiguously amorous heroine, and STILL managed to screw it all up (and assassinate most everyone's character along the way.)

( Tharrr be spoilers here. )

Otherwise, the plot was a poor mash-up at best (the Orlando Sentinel called it "a misshapen mess," and I agree), the costuming and sets were predictably beautiful (as was the cast), and I could not have been more disappointed by it all.